I call this more of an assembly than recipe because all of the “ingredients” are actually prepared foods. That, and it’s really easy.

To start you need:

• A slow cooker
• Two jars of Desert Pepper Trading Company’s Peach-Mango Salsa
• One can of your favorite brand tomato paste (I use Hunt’s)
• One jar/can of your favorite spaghetti sauce (I use Classico brand Marinara with plum tomatoes and olive oil)

Caveat

Let me begin by pointing out that I have absolutely no solid idea what the hell I am doing. I had a plan and an idea, but generally I just made stuff up as I went along. I am not a mason, have no masonry training, and do not play one on TV. However, as my creation has not fallen apart, it seems to have worked, which I think is what the builders of the Great Pyramid were thinking.

File this under "What the hell happened to the British?" The U.K.‘s National Children’s Bureau recently issued guidelines for "play leaders" and daycare supervisors to be on the lookout for racist behaviors in children even as young as three. Such racist behavior is revealed by a child saying "yuk" when served unfamiliar foreign food. Really. "Even babies can not be ignored in the drive to root out prejudice as they can ‘recognise different people in their lives.’" Staff are told: "No racist incident should be ignored. When there is a clear racist incident, it is necessary to be specific in condemning the action." Also, run and tell "the Authorities" as much as possible: "Some people think that if a large number of racist incidents are reported, this will reflect badly on the institution. In fact, the opposite is the case."

Defense Secretary Robert Gates announced today plans to nominate Army General David Petraeus to take over the U.S. military’s Central Command, placing him in command of both the Iraq and Afghanistan theaters. If confirmed by the Senate, General Petraeus will replace Adm. William Fallon, who stepped down in March amid rumors of disagreement with the Bush administration’s posture toward Iran. Taking over the reins of Coalition forces in Iraq will be Lt. Gen. Ray Odierno, who is credited with adapting the Petraeus doctrine into successful operational detail.

File this under "you gotta be kiddin’ me."

Out on the red carpet, Paul Haggis (the director whose "Crash" won Best Picture in 2006) said he didn’t know what accounts for all these deeply dark, brooding, troubled films. But isn’t it obvious, he asked, flashing an orange ribbon on his lapel. Orange, why orange? "It’s Guantanamo," his Max Azria-clad wife, Deborah, said, showing off her orange bracelet, which read: "Silence + torture = complicity." Suddenly, we noticed — orange ribbons and bracelets everywhere.

Musician and humanitarian activist Bob Geldof recently penned an article for TIME magazine recounting his visit with American president George W. Bush aboard Air Force One en route to Ghana, Africa, on Feb. 19, 2008. In the article, Geldof praises Bush on his record in regards to humanitarian aid in Africa, and criticizes the media’s neglect in telling that story.

It was, for example, Bush who initiated the President’s Emergency Plan for AIDS Relief (PEPFAR) with cross-party support led by Senators John Kerry and Bill Frist. In 2003, only 50,000 Africans were on HIV antiretroviral drugs — and they had to pay for their own medicine. Today, 1.3 million are receiving medicines free of charge. The U.S. also contributes one-third of the money for the Global Fund to Fight AIDS, Tuberculosis and Malaria — which treats another 1.5 million. It contributes 50% of all food aid (though some critics find the mechanism of contribution controversial). On a seven-day trip through Africa, Bush announced a fantastic new $350 million fund for other neglected tropical diseases that can be easily eradicated; a program to distribute 5.2 million mosquito nets to Tanzanian kids; and contracts worth around $1.2 billion in Tanzania and Ghana from the Millennium Challenge Account, another initiative of the Bush Administration.

They don’t make movies like this anymore. Folks, this film (which I recently caught on TCM) is the perfect storm of nerdiness. For the movie nerds, you have stellar performances by Peter O’Toole as Henry and Katherine Hepburn as Eleanor of Aquitaine, an endlessly quotable script with razor-sharp dialog that crackles with riveting drama and biting comedy and the first screen performance of the future Sir Anthony Hopkins. The story centers around Christmas Eve 1183, as Henry summons Eleanor from her prison and his three sons to his château and primary residence in Chinon, Anjou to decide who will succeed him as King. Henry favors John, Eleanor favors Richard and no one favors middle child Geoffrey. Throw in a very young Timothy Dalton as France’s King Philip II, the son of Eleanor’s ex-husband King Louis VII and you have a Machiavellian chess game of political and familial intrigue. Katherine Hepburn very nearly steals scenes from the mighty Peter O’Toole, instilling Eleanor with wit, precision intellect, fire, steal, love, heartache and vulnerability. O’Toole’s Henry is a veritable force of nature, a man’s man, virile and formidable even in his twilight years, but also weary of wars and intrigue. I can honestly see no other people in these parts: you need giants to portray giants.

The Assassination of Jesse James is not for everyone. It is long, slow paced, and contains very little action. That being said, the movie was excellent – truly Oscar-worthy. Assassination is an historical piece, a character study, a mediation on fame and infamy, and a look at America’s celebrity obsession – particularly with regards to "bad" people. The story of Jesse James’ celebrity status and mythic tales of heroism almost directly contradict the real man’s violent, casual brutality.

The Koran is the holy book of Islam, the direct word of Allah as spoken through the Angel Gabriel to Muhammad. Unlike the variations and translations of the Bible, the Koran exists today in the exact same wording and format as when it was first recorded by the third Caliph nearly fourteen centuries ago. Or so everyone believes.

Until recently, some of the oldest variations of the Koran were paper fragments discovered during a Mosque restoration in Sana’a, Yemen. When the thousands of fragments were studied it was learned that not only did some date back as far as the 7^th century, but many of them did not match to the modern version of the Koran. The Sana’a fragments stirred controversy in the 1980s when a German expert in Arabic calligraphy and Koranic paleography began studying them. "They don’t want it made public that there is work being done at all, since the Muslim position is that everything that needs to be said about the Koran’s history was said a thousand years ago," said Gerd-R. Puin. "These manuscripts say that the early history of the Koranic text is much more of an open question than many have suspected: the text was less stable, and therefore had less authority, than has always been claimed."

Terry Pratchett, best selling author of the Discworld series of humorous fantasy novels revealed to his fans the diagnosis of early onset Alzheimer’s disease. Posting a letter on the Discworld News section of artist Paul Kidby’s website, 58 year old Pratchett said, "I would have liked to keep this one quiet for a little while, but because of upcoming conventions and of course the need to keep my publishers informed, it seems to me unfair to withhold the news. I have been diagnosed with a very rare form of early onset Alzheimer’s…"
His letter states that he remains optimistic and philosophical about his future, and he "would prefer it if people kept things cheerful, because I think there’s time for at least a few more books yet :o)"