The OmniFlow or How Things get Done on OmniNerd
elcome to OmniNerd! You've probably already realized that OmniNerd is more than just a website; it's a collection of people, specifically, nerds. There are many facets of OmniNerd that may or may not be obvious to you at this point, which is why we've constructed this particular corner of the site: the OmniFlow. The OmniFlow is simply how the creators of the site envision users interacting with each other, the site, and the vast world known as the Internet. The text below outlines who we, The OmniNerds, are, how content makes it onto the site, the sort of content we prefer, and our vision for user interaction. The OmniFlow is half informative, half visionary, and overall just a tad entertaining. If nothing else, the OmniFlow should answer the most basic question about the site: What is OmniNerd? So again, welcome! We hope that you've found a new haunt on the Internet.
Who are the OmniNerds?
Put simply, OmniNerds are nerds of all sorts that have come together to revel in their nerdery. OmniNerd, the web site, facilitates the collaboration of such nerds. Most of them participate with the goal of soaking up some facet of nerdery outside of their typical forte, while at the same time providing other nerds insight into their particular specialty.
How do you filter the nerds from the non-nerds?
Imagine society as a very large bucket. This bucket is poured out like water through a strainer, and OmniNerd is that strainer. Those who pass through are the chosen ones, the nerds. Those who don't fall to their fiery deaths, or maybe they just don't join the site. Either way, the true nerds are allowed passage within, and must work diligently to maintain their nerd status.
How does this filter work?
OmniNerd seeks the participation of only the most devout nerds. To facilitate this, we have implemented a variety of systems to filter both content and users. The first filter is moderation. Everything on OmniNerd is moderated through interaction, review, and automation. This means an article's worth is determined based on how others interact. It's not about how many votes, how many page hits, or how many comments an article gets. It's about the dynamic between those attributes in conjunction with our algorithms and moderators that assess quality and nerdiness. Needless to say, if you're reading it on the OmniNerd front page, it's good for a wide variety of reasons.
The second filter is NerdRank. NerdRank is a number from 0-10 that is assigned to every registered user. Each flaunt of your nerdness on the site will be factored in daily to the Nerd Equation. The Nerd Equation is a mystical formula that considers all nerds and ranks them according to merit. No moderation is involved, just solid, objective factors.
Curse ye wretched and dastardly admins! Thou hath infringed upon my 1st Amendment rights!
There are some who would argue that our method of moderation somehow hinders free speech, one of the great gifts of America and the Internet in general. We, the OmniNerd moderation team, disagree. Our primary concern is that OmniNerd retain its nerdy quality. We could flood the front page with every single news submission we get, allow the highlight of sophomoric articles, and in turn discredit the top notch ideas provided by the OmniNerds – all in the name of more content ... but we don't want to. Instead, each level of participation is moderated differently to ensure the utmost nerd quality.
Such moderation is objective and consistent. However, if you should ever feel that your content was mistreated, please use the contact link located on every page of OmniNerd and let one of the administrators or moderators know. We will objectively consider your complaint and right any wrongs. If, by chance, you are the one to blame, we will all laugh heartily and your user name will be anathematized in our everyday conversation.
Do you ever worry that you might accidentally filter a nerd?
There are no accidents on OmniNerd. There are some, though, who may not be able to stomach OmniNerd for very long and leave. These people may indeed be educated, well-written, and intellectual giants. They are to be respected, but the title of "nerd" is not handed out freely. The system is such that anyone filtered is most certainly falling short in some aspect of nerdery.
The Fate of Those Within: Dante's Untold Tale
Surely you've read or at least heard of Dante's Inferno in which he describes the many circles of Hell and their occupants. What you probably haven't heard is that his ideas were actually unoriginal, a mere derivation of his witness to the inner-circles of OmniNerd.
No one knows exactly where one enters the infrastructure of OmniNerd. Some say that it is in the eighth circle, The Wild, where new nerds learn the ways of OmniNerd and grow from their failures. Others argue the ninth level is where most begin. The point of entry matters not, however, because a nerd is in dire straits until crossing the River Articleron, for only on its far shores can a humdrum nerd become an OmniNerd.
The journey can be a difficult one, but it is not impossible. Those dedicated to the pursuit and expression of nerdery may fail on occasion, but ought not be discouraged. If you find yourself intimidated by the scope of the task, examine your heart and grasp onto the small bit of nerd you will find there. Nourish this nerd-seed like you would your own child, and it will grow, bringing you the strength required to swim the murky River Commenthon, scale the foreboding Wall of Moderation and traverse the swift River Newsyx. In time, that little seedling, bursting with intelligence and a funny obsession with truth, might even catapult you directly into the coveted company of the Hallowed Article Authors.
Although Dante envisioned OmniNerd as some sort of contiguous linear system of circles, he did not account for the Great Fall. It is possible for even the most revered OmniNerds, the authors of great articles, to fall from grace into the ninth circle in one action of anonymity. Certainly, the other nerds will be deceived, not knowing one of their own leaders has made the plunge, but such judgment is reserved for a power far beyond the realm of even the administrators.
In summary, OmniNerd seeks to reward the authors of quality content. Gather to her bounty and hone your commenting skills, and your NerdRank will no doubt increase. Overcome the Wall of Moderation, leave your feelings of intimidation behind, and submit a news post to feel the adrenaline of surging nerdery. Dare to cross the River Articleron, and become the bearer of truth. Then, oh great OmniNerd, the site revolves around you.
Whence does this site come?
Some time ago, in ages past, Mark and Will decided that the drudgery of daily life was bringing them down and slowly enfeebling their minds. To counter that terrifying prospect they decided that they needed an outlet, a way to cultivate their "inner nerd." The idea of an online academic forum was in the making, but something stood between them: code. Soon, Will would rise to the gleaming, heavenly halls of OmniNerd and touch the world with his grace. Mark, however, fell from this purity and buried himself deep within OmniNerd, across the River Codeytus. Some say that Mark has taken the evils of code and built things like NerdRank to pit nerd against nerd. As far as anyone can tell though, there is a indescribable balance between the coding and the non-coding admins; however, we'll let you come to your own conclusions.
Fare thee well
OmniNerd is not for the meek. Should you choose to enter, you will be tested. Perhaps the best account of what lies within can be found in this ancient poem of unknown origins ...
Through me you pass into the city of learned strife:
Through me you pass into eternal juxtaposition:
Through me among the people bound to erudition.
Wit the founder of my intellect mov'd:
To rear was the task of power Moderate
Higher wisdom, and electronic love.
Before me things astute were none, save things
Logical, and logically I endure.
All fatuity abandon ye who enter here.